If you find yourself attracted to members of the opposite sex who happen to be older than you, fret not because you are not alone.
According to studies and surveys carried out over the years by different groups, unconventional relationships where two partners have a big age gap between them are becoming more popular.
They say that love is blind and sometimes, people fall in love with someone much older than them. There are many tips that can help you understand the dynamics of such a relationship if you are currently dating or are interested in someone older.
Here are some essential ones just for you!
- Don’t be intimidated
When you are dating someone older than you, you will probably feel a little intimidated at first by their success, stability in life, maturity and other aspects that come as you age. Don’t run away just yet. Remember that they are human and that they don’t have life figured out completely just like any other person. Your partner also probably understands that you need time to make mistakes and learn without judging you. Be confident that you also have a lot to bring into the relationship that your partner can also learn from.
2. Be yourself
Being in a relationship with someone older can tempt you to change your whole persona to fit what you assume they like. You might find yourself pretending to hate some of the things you actually love to impress them. Just because you are with someone older doesn’t mean they don’t know what fun is. You might even be surprised that you have a lot of things in common. Older people already know the value of being true to themselves so be open and don’t feel pressured to be someone you are not.
- Take things slow
When younger people start dating someone older, they often get blown away by their big houses, established businesses and solid careers. Many end up moving in too quickly with their partners for this reason. As exciting as they may be, learn to take things step by step to avoid making decisions you might regret later. Take time to know each other because this will allow you to think rationally when the bliss of his or her possessions disappear.
Your older partner has lived longer than you which likely means they may have more baggage. Some are divorcees and others may have children and grandchildren from previous relationships. Keep in mind that they had a whole life before you and this has an impact on who they are now. You should be vulnerable as well to show them that you fully accept them.
- Effective communication
The shift from dating your age mates to dating someone older comes with some challenges including communication issues. Since you are at different places in life, you might not always understand each other’s points of view. This can often lead to misunderstandings and arguments. Older people also learn that there is no use in holding back your thoughts and feelings when dealing with people. They appreciate when you are honest with them and when you let them truly know how you feel.
Find a middle ground where you both can understand each other and be honest when dealing with your partner.
- Be emotionally prepared
Understand that dating someone older requires you to make some changes. This type of relationship requires maturity of character especially. You should learn how to handle arguments and differences with grace. You should also show them that you are responsible and reliable in order for them to be confident with the relationship.
Also, it is important to note that friends, family and the society might not fully support the relationship at first. People are still more inclined to judge and stick with societal norms when it comes to big age differences in relationships. This requires courage and resilience in order to have a lasting relationship. Stand by what you and your partner believe in for a solid relationship
Source: Gillyweb.com | Nana Kwasi Baiden